ANAL AUGUST: Backdoor Basics

When it comes to backdoor play, bigger definitely isn't always better — especially when you're beginning.

Start with something small and comfortable, like a finger or beginner-friendly anal toy, and gradually work your way up only when you're ready.

Beginner tip: If you're using a toy for anal play, choose one specifically designed for it with a flared base or retrieval handle. Unlike the vagina, the rectum doesn't have a natural stopping point that prevents an object from traveling farther inside.

Think:

Small → Comfortable → Confident → Then explore.

This is one category where you DON'T want to be stingy.

Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't naturally produce lubrication. Adding plenty of personal lubricant reduces friction and can make anal play significantly more comfortable.

Water-Based Lube

A great beginner option and compatible with most toys and condoms. It may need to be reapplied more often.

Silicone-Based Lube

Longer-lasting and extra slippery, making it popular for backdoor play. Check your toy manufacturer's instructions before pairing silicone lubricant with silicone toys.

Pro tip: If you're using latex condoms, avoid oil-based products unless the condom manufacturer specifically says they're compatible.

Backdoor play isn't something you need to rush.

Give your body time to relax. Start with external stimulation before gradually introducing penetration. The person receiving should be able to control the pace, depth and intensity.

Pressure or fullness can feel unfamiliar at first.

Sharp or significant pain is your cue to STOP — not push through it.

Add more lube, slow down, switch things up or save it for another day.

You don't need an elaborate pre-game routine.

Basic hygiene — showering and gently washing the external area — is enough for many people.

For toys, follow the manufacturer's cleaning instructions before and after use.

And here's an important rule:

CLEAN OR CHANGE FIRST.

Don't move a toy, finger, penis or condom directly from the anus to the vagina without washing/changing it first.

If you're using condoms on toys, an easy option is simply putting on a fresh condom before switching where the toy is being used.

Anal sex can transmit sexually transmitted infections (STIs), and the delicate tissue inside the anus can be more susceptible to small tears.

Condoms and other barriers can help reduce STI transmission risk, while lubricant helps reduce friction and the chance of condom breakage.

New partner? It's also a good time to talk about STI testing and safer-sex preferences.

Sexy conversations can also be responsible conversations.

Before you start, talk about it.

What sounds good?

What's completely off-limits?

Who controls the pace?

How will you communicate if something doesn't feel right?

Consent isn't a one-time "yes." Anyone can slow down, change their mind or stop at any point.

The goal isn't to "successfully" have anal sex.

The goal is for everyone involved to actually enjoy themselves.